There are common fantasies that many confess to enjoying, and then
there are wild and wonderful ones that defy imagination. You
know the old adage whatever anyone of us can imagine doing
sexually, someone's tried!
A fantasy is a mind game
in which the imagination takes flight and places the fantasiser
in a sexual situation that he or she may not in reality ever contemplate.
Most people have a favourite one that is replayed either constantly
Some common fantasies
are: being in a threesome, being watched, having sex in a public
place, being tied up, beating or being beaten, being taken by force,
sex with a total stranger, having sex with a favourite movie or
pop star, having sex in some type of dangerous situation.
Fantasies enhance the
physical sensations of sex because the mind is the starter motor
for sexual feelings and thoughts are the petrol!
When babies touch their
own genitals, it is purely a tactile sensation, but by puberty,
most of us realise that having the mind and the body together in
gear increases excitement. Why do you think they supply sex
magazines and books in sperm donation clinics?
Again, I'm continually
asked if fantasising is 'normal'. I remember one listener
being very coy about his question until I assured him he was safe
to disclose on air. He finally told me that he had a fantasy
he was very embarrassed about and then revealed that he lusts after
women in hair rollers! I didn't dare ask him if he hangs around
hairdressing salons in the hope of catching a glimpse of one, but
just comforted him with the thought that his fantasy doesn't hurt
anyone and as long as it doesn't stop him enjoying sex in a normal
way, there is no problem.