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bisexuality


Some people do not believe bisexuality exists and, in fact, it's looked down upon by some gays who think it's a cop-out for not facing up to homosexual tendencies.  Is the implication, then, that bisexuality is more acceptable than homosexuality?  Is it better to be half 'normal' than not at all?  It buys into a lot of other issues, doesn't it?

I believe that there are genuinely bisexual people, that is, people who are more or less equally attracted to males and females sexually.  Some openly adopt this as a way of life, sleeping with both sexes as the opportunity arises.  Some marry one sex while continuing affairs with the opposite.  It may sound confusing but in the sense that we are all simply 'sexual' it's quite possible to be attracted to both men and women equally.

A very broad-minded and enlightened philosophy teaches that we do not fall in love with men and women at all, but with individual persons.  On that basis, maybe bisexuals are not less honest but more honest than the rest of us.  You'll have to make up your own mind about that.

It's enough to say that bisexuality exists, and is probably far more common than we realise because a lot of bisexuals would never label themselves as such.  Many gays have experimented with both sexes anyway.  I know of only one case where a gay guy told me that he could not even get an erection with a woman.  He was in his forties and, while he had been attracted to a number of women during his life, he could not perform with them sexually.  There may have been psychological reasons for this but I would say that he was an exception.  Gay guys might choose never to be sexually responsive to a woman but for it to be physically impossible sounds unusual.

Whether or not homosexuality is 'normal' is a debate that will no doubt continue to divide the community.  It is not an easy lifestyle and I can't see anyone choosing it just to be different or difficult.  The whole concept of 'being gay' is much more than a sexual choice.  It is a lifestyle, a philosophy, a way of being.  Therefore, who you choose to sleep with does not necessarily decide your sexual identity.  For example, in threesomes and group sex situations, are the women gay because they touch and kiss each other?  I think not.

If you believe you are gay all the way, then embrace it and be proud, love yourself regardless of what others think, but don't let anyone else decide your identity for you.  People who are the most against a particular way of life or choice usually have a hidden agenda, for example, homophobics may in fact have doubts about their own sexuality, so don't let them lay their hatred on you.

A gay friend once said to me that if all the homosexuals in the world were to turn purple, we'd be amazed at the number of them, and who they are!  All sexual labels are limited at best, and divisive at worst.

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